after so long finally reached my 100th..haha..
just came home from a shoot..hanwei's sis's 21st
she was wasted and had to be carried onto the car..poor girl..dead drunk..i still don't understand what's so nice about drinking..hmmm and i probably never will understand..will be posting some pics later..got quite frustrated at the focusing..it's was really dark..and the auto focus had to hunt for quite a while to give me a focus point..hmpf..what's the use of a photographer in darkness???
seeing hanwei's family..envious..mine could never be like that...probably because the age gap is too great for mine..and we're not as affluent..kinda lost tonight..not too sure what to take..haha..place was cramped..lights dimmed..challenge..but do get some interesting pictures..hope can find the time to edit them soon..
a lot of people question why photographers charge so much when all they have to do is to stand in-front of you and say "ready..1..2..3.. smile !!! and press the shutter release button and you get a picture..well..that's because you people never get to see the work behind getting that picture and the cost not known to people who are not in this line..
Before a photographer started his career..he's probably gotta go for courses..buy the entry dslr and lenses..try out on his own..all this time not earning a penny other than the satisfaction from a good photo..when he decided to go pro...have to buy better dslrs..better lenses and equipment..marketing work..faster computers..hundred of hours shooting and thousands more behind the monitor screen doing up the final touches for that picture you see and decide whether if it's worth your money...what I've mentioned is just some of the things i know..of cos I'm not at the pro level yet..so some of the other hidden effort and cost I'm not sure off..but all these mentioned comes up to a great number...
so next time when you wanna engage a photographer..do not question why we charge this and that..question the quality level we're at..ask for our portfolio..then if it satisfy your needs then engage the photographer..there's one for every budget..
never really study today...slept late..woke up late..reach home late..late late late..LATE seems to always get to me..I'm constantly trying to shake it off but it always caught up to me...hmpf..so gotta burn the wee hours lamp oil after I'm finish with this..
texted her when i had time in between my shoot just now..i felt this complex feeling inside me..frustration..disappointment..sad..angry..dejected..helpless..used..happy..glad..drunked(my plain water became liquor..hanwei's aunt changed it and i thought it's lime juice)..very complex la..I'm surprise i can feel so many things at one go and not go crazy..i wish i had the courage to just tell her what i feel..patience i have..but it's no use..effort i put in..but it's not enough..care i gave..but it's too little..
i don't know what else to do already..nothing i did seems to work..and when you start to feel disappointed..it's just that much harder..knowing that what you're doing will eventually go down the drain..then why do so much? it takes 1/5 courage and 4/5 naiveness to hang on..when courage runs out...we start to look naive...
There's no such thing as a happy ending..not for everyone..to have one..one has to do so much good in his/her life..I've done too much bad..i won't have a happy ending..
Don't believe in karma...just do to the best of your
ability...and leave no regrets...if all else fails...look back...and smile because it happened
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