It's the end of 2010.
1/1/11 is coming.
The year 2010 was not bad.
Nothing really fantastic happened but nothing bad happen either.
I guess nothing bad is a form of good.
This year saw a pretty significant transition in my life.
Officially done with schools.
I've managed to grab my honours, second class lower division that is.
First half of the year was rather forgettable. Ashton's birthday in April, did a photo shoot for NUH in march, went to South Korea in June right after my exams. My D80 got fried while on loan to Andrew but manage to salvage it in the service centre. Hit the car's butt for the first time, which is still not repaired. Finally got my iPhone, although the novelty has wore off already. Applied and employed at Apixels photography.
That's about summed up he significant events in 2010.
Still at Apixels for the time being, looking for new job now. One that's more serious and with a better package and with a better time schedule. Plans are on the way in the making, so 2011 will be an interesting beginning.
Another Xmas come and gone. It was a good Xmas. I've enjoyed a musical directed by Derrick at his church's Xmas service. Met lots of long lost friends and it's nice to know everyone is doing really well.
Some are chasing dreams, some studying overseas while some have great plans ahead
good luck people! Lets work hard together.
I've got everyone a give back home, giving feels better than receiving. I just regretted not being able to return more to those in need back in society. I need to improve on that next year.
Got Audrey a nice gift too, but I've decided against giving it to her after listening to something Lay Kwuan was telling me while we were catching a movie on Xmas night. She was rather disturbed by her ex boyfriend who's not able to move on while she already has. A very similar situation to mine. I've always ponder about this. I felt that by doing what I did, I was holding on to a hope. But I wonder how she feels. Guess it weighs more when this was narrated by another person.
I think this is god's way of dropping hints to me that I'm doing something wrong and should change in future. Which is why I've decided to keep the present this year round. I may not be able to move on nicely, but I should never hinder/bother/disturb her with my inability. It'll only leave a distasteful mark in life, something that I know but hearing it from someone else somehow makes more sense than my inner thoughts.
So I decided to keep the stuff locked up in my box of memories. Whether or not I get to meet her again in any circumstance, I should keep it to myself and set her free.
Life will only get better if you keep trying to improve it.
I believe I'll be able to make a good future ahead.
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Monday, December 6, 2010
Time travel
Into the third month at Apixels, getting used to the work, irregular schedules, and the " interesting people ". The work place environment is good, no difficult person which I cannot handle. Still doing pretty much the same stuff after two months, which is not what I anticipated. Was hoping to be able to learn much more than the current level. What they have is experience which needs to be shared, but not so much yet. I can ask alot but without the experience, it's not enough, not happening fast enough.
Finance is tight. Got lots of bills to pay, more than half the salary goes to bills and parents' allowance. This is not the way to go. I need to be financially more stable to pursue a passion like this. Working for people to achieve this dreams is not going to allow me to support a family and be financially free.
I think i'm going to leave Apixels soon or later, probably sooner and go back to the finance sector, earn my capital so as to go after my goals. Everything revolves around money. Without it, everything is harder. I just hope it'll be a good closure to 2010, and a brand new start to a new decade.
Did some cooking for gatherings and received pretty good comments. It's a joy to cook for people and and they appreciates it. Hope for more this festive season!
Was watching Fringe season 2 White Tulip episode. It's about time traveling to correct a wrong, to save a love one, to erase a " regret " . Asked myself what I want to do if I've got such a chance to go back and redo something in my life i regretted deeply and something I can do better, the first thing which came to mind was year 2007. Go back to 3 years ago and start over from there. Many things happened that year. After I finish my NSF days, working at fortis, getting my first camera, meeting Audrey and of course my studies.
I wold want to establish strong contacts with the people at fortis, I would want to do more with my photography, I would want to study smarter and harder and most importantly, I want to treasure Audrey . I can go on and on about what/how I would have done better with her, so many things I want to redo, to make things work between me and her.
Time travel don't exist in my lifetime.
I can only imagine.
Hope you're doing well.
Finance is tight. Got lots of bills to pay, more than half the salary goes to bills and parents' allowance. This is not the way to go. I need to be financially more stable to pursue a passion like this. Working for people to achieve this dreams is not going to allow me to support a family and be financially free.
I think i'm going to leave Apixels soon or later, probably sooner and go back to the finance sector, earn my capital so as to go after my goals. Everything revolves around money. Without it, everything is harder. I just hope it'll be a good closure to 2010, and a brand new start to a new decade.
Did some cooking for gatherings and received pretty good comments. It's a joy to cook for people and and they appreciates it. Hope for more this festive season!
Was watching Fringe season 2 White Tulip episode. It's about time traveling to correct a wrong, to save a love one, to erase a " regret " . Asked myself what I want to do if I've got such a chance to go back and redo something in my life i regretted deeply and something I can do better, the first thing which came to mind was year 2007. Go back to 3 years ago and start over from there. Many things happened that year. After I finish my NSF days, working at fortis, getting my first camera, meeting Audrey and of course my studies.
I wold want to establish strong contacts with the people at fortis, I would want to do more with my photography, I would want to study smarter and harder and most importantly, I want to treasure Audrey . I can go on and on about what/how I would have done better with her, so many things I want to redo, to make things work between me and her.
Time travel don't exist in my lifetime.
I can only imagine.
Hope you're doing well.
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
First mobile blog
first time blogging on mobile..kinda cool :) reason being..damn computer is down! like dunno how many million times already..give up..gonna get a new one once i get my pay..
been awhile since last entry..now doing commercial photography at apixels..being an apprentice is tough..but cant give up the chance..the most difficult part is the waiting and not doing stuff related to photography..like now..waiting for client to approve on a simple shoot can take forever..and in between waiting..there's nothing we can do..well other than bitching about it..
But i've indeed learn quite alot in just one month's time..how to deal with people/talents..lightings..this experience will only benefit me in the future when i've the capital to start my own biz..
the most interesting thing to note is that i'm assigned to SIM's casting call ad for the following year..such is life...coincendence..oh well...
kinda miss school too..will be doing CFA later probably register in dec for june's exams..so will be doing some studying again :)
planning to go for a long trip some time next year..still trying to link the places i wanna go..somewhere less humid than singapore..haha..saving hard now..
19 minutes have passed since client's last email..there's still no reply !
and 19 minutes will become a few hours..damn..almost OT every..driving me nuts..dunno if i can take this for how long more..
get back to work for now...........
been awhile since last entry..now doing commercial photography at apixels..being an apprentice is tough..but cant give up the chance..the most difficult part is the waiting and not doing stuff related to photography..like now..waiting for client to approve on a simple shoot can take forever..and in between waiting..there's nothing we can do..well other than bitching about it..
But i've indeed learn quite alot in just one month's time..how to deal with people/talents..lightings..this experience will only benefit me in the future when i've the capital to start my own biz..
the most interesting thing to note is that i'm assigned to SIM's casting call ad for the following year..such is life...coincendence..oh well...
kinda miss school too..will be doing CFA later probably register in dec for june's exams..so will be doing some studying again :)
planning to go for a long trip some time next year..still trying to link the places i wanna go..somewhere less humid than singapore..haha..saving hard now..
19 minutes have passed since client's last email..there's still no reply !
and 19 minutes will become a few hours..damn..almost OT every..driving me nuts..dunno if i can take this for how long more..
get back to work for now...........
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
updates
back from a three month hiatus..
briefly-
March till May was all about exams preparation and of course, the final exam of my boring university life.
Still not too sure about how I fare, a bit of confidence yet lingers some insecurities. But all that is past now and what's important is the future. I am currently looking for some form of overseas internship opportunity in either banking and finance service, marketing and business or advertising. Either that or I'll be doing some form of photography, probably as an assistant for some pros. not looking to jump right into a fixed nine to five job yet, as I'll not be able to get anything good out of it. Am fighting the constant battle of money vs passion. Whether I should be doing a job that I like or a job that is good in everyone's eyes. Two old folks to be taken care of here, can't be selfish, yet the urge to be in the creative business is so tempting. The freedom to pursue one's dreams and passion is something so simple, yet so complicated.
No one knows what I want, only I know.
Yet it's just so hard to make a decision. I know I just need to make that decision and I'll stick to it through the end, that ever so difficult first step. (千里之行，始于足下)
Maybe a few years out alone will hone my decision making.
Just came back from South Korea earlier this month. Was a good trip, not fantastic, but certainly one to remember for years to come. A snippet of my trip will follow later. Miss the kimchi, miss the weather, miss the minbak, miss the driving in jeju-do, miss the beautiful legs, miss being on a relaxing trip. Will be looking to go back South Korea in the other seasons and also more trips in future. Realised that I really love travelling, not just because we can go out and have fun, but more of being able to see new/different things/places and experience things that I never did in the past. Really enjoy the experience and I'll follow up with the places that I've decided to visit before I die.
And this is one other reason I cannot just do what I want. I need to plan, need to save up for these trips. If I were to become a photographer, will the income be able to cover all these things I've in mind?
briefly-
March till May was all about exams preparation and of course, the final exam of my boring university life.
Still not too sure about how I fare, a bit of confidence yet lingers some insecurities. But all that is past now and what's important is the future. I am currently looking for some form of overseas internship opportunity in either banking and finance service, marketing and business or advertising. Either that or I'll be doing some form of photography, probably as an assistant for some pros. not looking to jump right into a fixed nine to five job yet, as I'll not be able to get anything good out of it. Am fighting the constant battle of money vs passion. Whether I should be doing a job that I like or a job that is good in everyone's eyes. Two old folks to be taken care of here, can't be selfish, yet the urge to be in the creative business is so tempting. The freedom to pursue one's dreams and passion is something so simple, yet so complicated.
No one knows what I want, only I know.
Yet it's just so hard to make a decision. I know I just need to make that decision and I'll stick to it through the end, that ever so difficult first step. (千里之行，始于足下)
Maybe a few years out alone will hone my decision making.
Just came back from South Korea earlier this month. Was a good trip, not fantastic, but certainly one to remember for years to come. A snippet of my trip will follow later. Miss the kimchi, miss the weather, miss the minbak, miss the driving in jeju-do, miss the beautiful legs, miss being on a relaxing trip. Will be looking to go back South Korea in the other seasons and also more trips in future. Realised that I really love travelling, not just because we can go out and have fun, but more of being able to see new/different things/places and experience things that I never did in the past. Really enjoy the experience and I'll follow up with the places that I've decided to visit before I die.
And this is one other reason I cannot just do what I want. I need to plan, need to save up for these trips. If I were to become a photographer, will the income be able to cover all these things I've in mind?
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Heavy hearted.......
Been busy..prelims is round the corner..in march..
working hard towards it..done a couple of wedding and a corporate shoot for NUH..
Ashton was hospitalised..some unknown disease..but doctors guess it something that attacks the white blood cells..seeing him in tubes..and still playful at the same time..such is his strength to fight even at a small tender age..everything is more stable now..but reviews still have to be conducted..doctors fear the jab they gave him might have side effects on the long run and that he may have to be on medication for long..but for now..everything seems fine..and i noe it'll be ok..it just have to be..
on the lighter side..he has been through his first LNY..receiving hugs and loves and of cos lots of ang pao..
Been watching 咖啡王子一号店..really like the show..maybe it's the rich's lifestyle tt attracts me..i've been poor for too long..haha..but really, it's the simple sweet relationship between friends and lovers..and the friendly family ties that accompany the male lead..it's something i look forward to..it may be fantasy..made up...but to have a goal is good..and it's not totally impossible..go eun chan portrayed by yoon eun hye is really sweet too..it's really hard to find someone lidat in reality..which made it fresh and refershing...
lastly..been feeling heavy hearted the past couple of days..week....it's that general feeling of something is wrong in your heart..can't explain...but just not right..close to a heartache..but not close enough..not that i've got anyone new..rather..i dunno..
she's been gone for 3 years now..time flies..when you're alone..faster than you realise..faster than you can react..hmmm..still misses her at times..wonder if it's becoming a habit..if it is..den it's bad..cos i'll always remember this phrase from my primary school teacher..
"when you remove H...you still have ABIT...when you remove A...you still have that BIT...even when you shake off B...you still have IT..never start a bad habit...it'll be very hard to remove.."
will be busy again starting today...back to school..back to mugging..all coming to an end..end of studies..wads next..i wonder.....
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